Quotable Quotes

Brain cells come and brain cells go, but fat cells live forever.

Life is an endless struggle full of frustrations and challenges, but eventually you find a hairstylist you like.

I’ve told you a million times not to exaggerate!

To be bad-mouthed by a fool is the same as getting compliments from a wise man.

I am willing to make the mistakes if someone else is willing to learn from them.

Credit cards are a great way of spending money you wish you had.

How come none of these feminists have declared Satan is a woman, too?

Middle age is when you burn the midnight oil around 9:00 PM.

Don’t bother me. I’m living happily ever after.

You KNOW technology has passed you by when you have a power outage and nothing you own is blinking.

It’s time for a change…and I have the remote.

The problem with doing nothing is that you never know when you are finished.

Experience is a hard teacher because it gives the test first and the lesson afterwards.

Winners make it happen, losers let it happen.

It is easier to get older than it is to get wiser.

Forget the health foods. I need all the preservatives I can get.

It is better to be over the hill than under it.

Please, Lord, let me prove that winning the lottery won’t spoil me.

Humor is not just a joke now and then. It’s a basic survival tool.

You know you’re getting old when beautiful young women start calling you “sweetie” and “honeybun.”

Trust only those who stand to lose as much as you if things go wrong.

Half of the people in the world are below average

A crisis is when you can’t say, “Let’s forget the whole thing.”

I’d rather regret something I did, rather than something I didn’t do.

He who cuts corners will soon find himself going around in circles.

Last Modified on November 8, 2017
This entry was posted in Humor - Q
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