Resume Bloopers

These are taken from actual resumes and cover letters:

* “I am a rabid typist.”

* “Proven ability to track down and correct erors.”

* “Suspected to graduate early next year.”

* “Accomplishments: Oversight of entire department.”

* “Strengths: Ability to meet deadlines while maintaining composer.”

* “Here are my qualifications for you to overlook.”

* “After receiving advice from several different angels, I have decided to pursue a new line of work.”

* “As indicted, I have over five years of experience analyzing investments.”

* “Am a perfectionist and rarely if if ever forget details.”

* “Accomplishments: Completed 11 years of high school.”