Love and Forgiveness Are Inseparable :: by Sean Gooding

Matthew chapter 5: 33-48 (continued)

“Again, you have heard that it was said to the men of old, you shall not swear falsely, but you shall perform your oaths to the Lord [as a religious duty].

But I tell you, ‘Do not bind yourselves by an oath at all: either by heaven, for it is the throne of God; or by the earth, for it is the footstool of His feet; or by Jerusalem, for it is the city of the Great King. And do not swear by your head, for you are not able to make a single hair white or black. Let your Yes be simply ‘Yes,’ and your No be simply ‘No;”’anything more than that comes from the evil one.

You have heard that it was said, an eye for an eye, and a tooth for a tooth. 3But I say to you, Do not resist the evil man [who injures you]; but if anyone strikes you on the right jaw or cheek, turn to him the other one too. And if anyone wants to sue you and take your undershirt (tunic), let him have your coat also.  And if anyone forces you to go one mile, go with him two [miles].  Give to him who keeps on begging from you, and do not turn away from him who would borrow at interest] from you.

You have heard that it was said, You shall love your neighbor and hate your enemy; But I tell you, Love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you, To show that you are the children of your Father Who is in heaven; for He makes His sun rise on the wicked and on the good, and makes the rain fall upon the upright and the wrongdoers [alike].

For if you love those who love you, what reward can you have? Do not even the tax collectors do that? And if you greet only your brethren, what more than others are you doing? Do not even the Gentiles (the heathen) do that? You, therefore, must be perfect [growing into complete maturity of godliness in mind and character, having reached the proper height of virtue and integrity], as your heavenly Father is perfect.

The last verse in this passage is a scary verse and when I read it I can simply say that it makes me catch my breath.  I need to be ‘perfect’ like my Heavenly Father is.  Perfect!  That is a tall order.  How can I be perfect?  How can you be perfect?  We know that there was only one perfect man, Jesus.  He never sinned and He never failed.  How then can we be prefect?

Before we get there let us look at the other verses in this passage and see if they can help us to figure this out.  The Bible is its best interpreter and if you don’t understand something, just keep reading and searching and God will explain it somewhere else.

 Do Not Swear by God’s Name, Speak the Truth Always, Verses 33-37

Simply put we are to mean what we say. We are not to be double tongued and two faced. Our words should be trustable? Why, you may ask?  Because God is the God of truth and it is IMPOSSIBLE for God to lie. Thus as His children and as ambassadors of the kingdom of Christ (2 Corinthians 5:20) we should tell the truth and have such a reputation for telling the truth that people believe us and we respect them enough not to take advantage of their trust.

We not to swear to tell the truth by things that we do not have control over; neither by heaven nor earth both of which belong to the Lord. And we are not to swear even by the hairs on our heads simply because we have no control over our lives either. We live each day by the grace of God and some of us can’t guarantee that we will have hair on our heads to swear by.

Those will full heads of hair today are the bald ones tomorrow. Some with beautiful heads of hair in their youth turn gray in midlife and on and on. We simply do not have control over these things. Even with modern things like dyes and what not we can simply stave off the inevitable for a short time but we cannot change it.

Rather our words should have weight, when we say “Yes,” then that should mean something and have weight behind it.  The same should be so with our ‘No’.  If our words cannot be trusted we are no longer representing the Kingdom of Light.  The devil is the father of all lies and liars we are told in John 8:44.

These are harsh words and they certainly cut me to the bone. I can honestly say that my words are not always truth.  I often say things to “protect my own skin” as they say and if you are honest so do you.  We swear to tell the truth when we are just covering our butts for lying. Often we swear to tell the truth knowing full well that we intend to lie.  We make a mockery of the truth and of God when we identify ourselves as Christians yet we speak lies.

The truth, they say, will set you free, but it can also cost you a lot.  In spite of the cost we should, with the power of the Holy Spirit in us, discipline ourselves to tell the truth and to be seen as trustworthy.  It is very hard to tell someone the truth of the Gospel when they don’t trust the person delivering the message.

Do Not Seek Revenge, Seek Peace, Verses 38-39

In the Old Testament Law the rule of “an eye for an eye and a tooth for a tooth” was well engrained. In Exodus 21:23-25 we see these words:

“But if there is any further injury, then you shall appoint as a penalty life for life, eye for eye, tooth for tooth, hand for hand, foot for foot, burn for burn, wound for wound, bruise for bruise.”

The Jews of Jesus’ day and for generations before had lived by these rules.  Compassion and forgiveness was not common as we see even in the lives of the religious leaders.  They were always looking for someone to kill for a sin or sins.  This would have been a cruel society that Jesus came into.  Simple mistakes could have led to life changing injuries and maiming.  This is not to dissuade justice or the law of the land.  But people needed to learn how to forgive and how to move on.

Jesus often forgave people their sins, Luke 7:48 and Matthew 9:5 are some examples of this.  This seemed to get under the skin of the Pharisees. They liked having a person’s failures to hang over their heads like an axe waiting to drop. But Jesus was quick to forgive and to encourage us to forgive.

In Matthew 18: 21-22 we find these words from Jesus:

“Then Peter came and said to Him, ‘Lord, how often shall my brother sin against me and I forgive him? Up to seven times?’ Jesus said to him, ‘I do not say to you, up to seven times, but up to seventy times seven.’”

The idea was that we were to forgive all the time.  When we compare what God has forgiven us to what ‘sins’ have been done against us we have no excuse not to forgive and to forgive always.  We are not only called to forgive we are told not to retaliate.  Our forgiveness should be so complete that we do not feel the need to retaliate and even if we do we, by the power of the Holy Spirit, will learn to suppress that desire to ‘hit back’ and ‘get even’.

Being a forgiving person is not a sign of weakness, but a disciplined meekness where we learn by the power of the Holy Spirit in us to put our rights aside for the good of the other.  It is more important for the person to see the grace of God through us than that we get even.

What if God hit back?  What if He did to us what we deserve? Well that was what the ‘eye for an eye’ was all about; it was never a rule to build a society on.  It was a part of the Mosaic Law designed to show us our need for God’s grace, we see in Galatians 3:23-25,

But before faith came, we were kept in custody under the law, being shut up to the faith which was later to be revealed. 24Therefore the Law has become our tutor to lead us to Christ, so that we may be justified by faith. 25But now that faith has come, we are no longer under a tutor.

You see the harshness of the Law was designed to drive us to Jesus and to fall on His grace.  It was never to be the foundation of a nation.  But men will always distort God’s rules and use it for evil.  The religious leaders of the day used the Law like a hammer to subdue people and they kept their distance so that the common people could not see that they were sinners like us all.  Jesus on the other hand lived among the people, they saw His righteous living and they knew He was different than the religious leaders.

We see these words in Mark 1:22:

“And they were completely astonished at His teaching, for He was teaching as One Who possessed authority, and not as the scribes.”

Forgiveness is the true foundation of any relationship. You see forgiveness is driven by love, we will always forgive people we love and we will not forgive those we don’t love. Those two are tied together; many times in the Scriptures we are told that “love covers a multitude of sins.” No greater example of love exists than that of Jesus dying on the cross for us. His death offered the opportunity for all people to have their sins forgiven before a Holy God.

When we love our neighbor we will forgive them. Thus the reminder from the Lord to “love our neighbor” and then in John 13:34-35 we are told that “it is by the way that we love each other that people will know that we are His disciples.”

This was a foreign teaching to many of the people of that day and frankly of many today. We are called to love each other; this is the basics of Christianity. But beyond that we are called to love our enemies, serve our enemies and to forgive them when they hurt us.  Jesus, of course, would never ask us to do anything that He did not set the example of first.  As He was dying Jesus said this in Luke 23:34”

“Then Jesus said, ‘Father, forgive them, because they do not know what they are doing.’”

Let’s follow His example; because of this a centurion was saved that day.  This is the power of love and forgiveness.

Missionarybaptistchurch76@yahoo.ca

http://www.mississaugamissionarybc.com/

Marriage: Keep Forgiving Each Other :: by Sean Gooding

Matthew chapter 5:31-32 (continued)

“Furthermore it has been said, ‘Whoever divorces his wife, let him give her a certificate of divorce.’ But I say to you that whoever divorces his wife for any reason except sexual immorality causes her to commit adultery; and whoever marries a woman who is divorced commits adultery.”

Last time we talked about our hearts and keeping our thought lives in check so that we would  not sin. We saw that God was just as interested in how we though as to how we acted. Many of us will act like Christians should but we do not think like Christians should. God made it clear that our thought lives were just as important to Him as our actions. God thoughts and His actions towards us are one and the same.

In Jeremiah 29:11, we find these sobering words:

“For I know the thoughts that I think toward you, saith the LORD, thoughts of peace, and not of evil, to give you an expected end.”

Notice that God has thoughts of peace toward us. When we are in Jesus and have the salvation that He has paid for we are at peace with God. We are ‘justified’, Romans 5:1 and there is “no condemnation” Romans 8:1 from God toward us. His thoughts towards are good thoughts so His actions towards us are good actions.

I must admit that this is a hard thing to come to grips with sometimes. It is easy to come to the conclusion that God hates us or is against us especially when we are going through a hard time  or a rough spot in life.  We think that God has turned on us, but nothing could be farther from the truth when we are in Christ. God further reinforces this idea of how He thinks with this verse: “For as he thinketh in his heart, so is he” (Proverbs 23:7a).

So for our God to be holy and righteous He must also think this way in His heart.  God’s actions are a true reflection of how He thinks. And this is what Jesus is talking about as He begins to show what true Christianity is all about. The Pharisees and Scribes had reduced the Law to an outward act with no real change of heart. A kind of ‘do this and you will live’, but what Jesus taught was “be this and you will live.” Be real; be genuine; love God and love man.

Today we will look at the issue of marriage, divorce and remarriage. These are touchy subjects that Jesus dealt with; but He dealt with them nonetheless. In that day, much like today, divorce had become a weapon that men wielded to subjugate women.

Most women of that day depended heavily on their husbands for shelter and care. Most did not have any rights of their own and certainly not much wealth. Thus being married was a woman’s way of having a home, money, enough food and someone to care for her as she aged. There was no real welfare system in Jesus’ day.

Divorce was a publicly humiliating event that was used as weapon. In contrast to how it was usually used, think of Joseph’s reaction to finding out that Mary was pregnant.  He was going to put her away privately and not put here through the public humiliation that could have ended in her being executed. Remember the account of women caught in adultery, they were ready to stone her to death.

The Certificate of Divorce, Verse 31

The certificate of divorce is found and allowed in Deuteronomy 24:1-2:

“When a man hath taken a wife, and married her, and it come to pass that she find no favor in his eyes, because he hath found some uncleanness in her: then let him write her a bill of divorcement, and give it in her hand, and send her out of his house. And when she is departed out of his house, she may go and be another man’s wife.”

In talking to Israel about her infidelity God uses the same idea in Isaiah 50:1, asking “Where is the bill of divorce I gave your mother?” This was a sign of God’s displeasure with Israel for following after false gods and prostituting themselves before the idols of the pagans around them.

However God forgave Israel and redeemed them. This is the same theme in the prophetic book of Hosea where God sends him to marry a prostitute, symbolizing Israel, and then to redeem her even after she had left him and committed adultery with another man.

So, God uses this imagery to show the way that Israel treated Him and how we should be towards an offending partner. God gives one the right to use a “writ of divorce” but would rather there be reconciliation if at all possible. God would rather see forgiveness and love than divorce.

We must also understand the sequence in which Jesus gave these lessons, He pointed out that even looking at a woman to lust after her was adultery, thus arming the wife of the marriage with the tools to ask for divorce and put the man to shame. Of course it would be difficult for one to prove the thoughts of another. But God knew their thoughts.

What if Jesus, in the account of the woman caught in adultery, simply wrote down what the men were thinking as they stood there?  What if He simply revealed their hearts desires and the Holy Spirit convicted them? (Maybe one day we will know.)

 Sexual Immorality, Verse 32

What is sexual immorality? In this case it is having sexual relations with someone who is not your husband or wife. So if a husband or wife were to discover that their spouse was cheating   on them they could divorce their spouse. Moses in the Law gives broader latitude for divorce  and allowed a much lower standard. This is an interesting observation because it was not uncommon for a man to have more than one wife.

We see that even amongst the patriarchs, Jacob had 4 wives, David 10 that we know of and Elkanah, Samuel’s father had 2 wives and on and on we can go. A husband was simply not allowed to abandon his wife even for the cause of adultery and even if he did it was to be after much effort was done to reconcile and maintain the picture of the oneness between them.

Proverbs 10:12 tell us that, “Love covers a multitude of sin.”

In the gospels we are encouraged to forgive liberally and God sets the ultimate example of forgiveness with both we as individuals and with the nation of Israel as a collective. God designed marriage to mimic the unconditional love that He has for us; a love that transcends failures and sin and shortcomings. Sadly too many of us fail to see this and walk away from our marriages.

In Malachi 2:15-16 we are told not to deal treacherously with our wives, not to treat her badly since she is our flesh.  We are no longer two people but one as far as God is concerned. God hates divorce because it mars the picture that He designed marriage to portray. When we become a child of God we are “married” to Him; He lives in us and we are inseparable from the day of salvation through eternity, we in him and him in us; one.

Now God did divorce Israel and leave her to be taken captive into foreign lands where many of her people died and suffered. But He always came back for her, the “divorce” was but for a short time and then He redeemed her. Israel on the other hand often adopted the gods of her captors and played the part of the adulterous wife.

The conclusion then is that whoever divorces his wife except for the reason of adultery, and that after much forgiveness and determination to reconcile, is in the wrong. Marriage is the picture of what God is like with the nation of Israel and with the New Testament church.

Look at the account of the Laodicean church in Revelation and we see Jesus knocking on the door of an apostate church asking to be let in. Constantly seeking reconciliation is what Jesus and God do with us; and it is how we should be with each other and especially our wives. This kind of reconciliation should permeate the church and the kingdom of God.

“Men, love you wives and cherish them as gifts from the Living God” (Proverbs 18:22).

A man who finds a wife finds a good thing and obtains favor from the LORD.

 

Mississionarybaptistchurch76@yahoo.ca

www.mississaugamissionarybc.com