Biblical Masculinity 2: Desire to be a Man in the image of God 

First of all, let me apologize for the typos on the last email to my church brethren. Please forgive me. I did not do a good job of editing. Nonetheless, the need for us to learn about Godly masculinity is very, very important in our time.

We live in a time where boys are told they can be girls and vice-versa; this is a lie. We live in a time where the beautiful individuality of the sexes as designed by God is being downplayed, and we are being robbed of the fluidity that is like a dance when the two sexes excel at their designed best. In a recent statistic that I saw, it showed that 43% of boys were raised in a home where there were only moms, and that 80% of all teachers were women. The conclusion was that, for almost 50% of boys, there are no male role models in their lives. The problem then is not that these boys are seeing toxic masculinity; they are not seeing any positive masculine role models at all.

In the previous article, we worked at showing that God did not hate women at all; in fact, He delicately and deliberately created them as they are with their strengths and abilities. We also showed that God designed women and men differently, even down to their skeletal structure. Things like eyesight, muscular structure and instincts are all different between the sexes. We also showed that God designed a woman to complete a man and to make him better than he is by himself.

1. Why are men so important?

In an article entitled “The Real, Complex Connection Between Single-Parent Families and Crime” by Kay Hymowitz, published Dec 3, 2012, we find this harrowing statistic:

The 1987 “Survey of Youth in Custody” found that 70% did not grow up with both parents. Another 1994 study of Wisconsin juveniles was even more stark: only 13% grew up with their married parents. Here’s the conclusion of Cynthia Harper and Sara McLanahan, the doyenne of researchers about single parenthood: “Controlling for income and all other factors, youths in father-absent families (mother only, mother-stepfather, and relatives/other) still had significantly higher odds of incarceration than those from mother-father families.”

The importance of fathers in the household is critical. There is something that God put in men that is essential to the successful future of their children. This is not even about saved or Christian men; this is just men in general. Men are needed to secure the future success of their children.

Now, lest someone gets out of whack, there have been many mothers who have raised great children. There have been some amazing men to come out of the homes of single mothers. Dr. Ben Carson, one of the most highly educated men in North America, an excellent surgeon and now the Secretary of HUD in the US government, is such a product. But what we are noting is the norm, not the exception. In general, where there is no father in the household, there are disciplinary problems, and young men – and now more often young women – end up in the court system.

This is no accident. This is a planned attack on the family. God designed the nuclear family: a man, a woman and their children. He designed the family unit before He had nations, and millennia before the church was set up. The nuclear family is the foundation of all societies, and it is the sure footing upon which nations are built. But over the past 50+ years, there has been an orchestrated attack on men, and as such, the nuclear family. The attack is ultimately on God and a defiant “finger wagging,” if you will, that laughs in the face of His expressed plan.

This lack of respect in the home and in society for the role of men has translated into the Lord’s churches as well, and we see a growing disfunction in churches and ultimately in the Lord’s family. Any attack on the nuclear family will also weaken churches. A simple overview of most churches, even very conservative ones, will show that the vast majority of attendees are women and children. There is a lack of men in our churches; mom is leading the family to church, NOT dad. Thus, young men get the idea that church is for women and kids; and soon they leave as well once they are no longer under mom’s authority. The Lord’s churches are destitute of strong, Godly men.

2. Godly men are strong men

There are different kinds of strength but, in this case, we are talking about physical strength. In Luke 11:21 we see this verse:

“When a strong man, fully armed, guards his own house, his possessions are safe.”

In the first two chapters of Numbers, God calls for a census of men ‘able to carry the sword’; they had to be over 20 years old. In chapter 2:32 we see the total:

“These are those which were numbered of the children of Israel by the house of their fathers: all those that were numbered of the camps throughout their hosts were six hundred thousand and three thousand and five hundred and fifty.”

These men were responsible for the protection of the nation when at war and from her enemies. God required that the men of Israel be strong men capable of waging war when necessary; men who knew how to handle a weapon; and men who could take orders and run to the fight and not from it. My goodness; you might think this seems as if they are dangerous men. Yes, they are, and every man should be seen as dangerous to those that would cross his family and his nation. The same Jesus who cuddled the small children also turned over the tables in the Temple, and ran the money changers out (Matthew 21:12). King David showed himself to be a capable warrior because he killed both a lion and bear whilst guarding his father’s sheep (1 Samuel 17:34-36).

But David said to Saul, “Your servant was tending his father’s sheep. When a lion or a bear came and took a lamb from the flock, I went out after him and attacked him, and rescued it from his mouth; and when he rose up against me, I seized him by his beard and struck him and killed him. Your servant has killed both the lion and the bear; and this uncircumcised Philistine will be like one of them, since he has taunted the armies of the living God.”

God wants strong men, physically, at the head of our families. This is very important; you see God is the head of the Christian family and He is a strong Father. But many modern churches have gotten away from the ALL-POWERFUL God, and present Jesus/God as a bit of a ‘sap.’

Any child in their right mind in my generation, born in the mid-sixties, had a healthy fear of their dads. Mine was a Godly man who loved me and my brothers and loved my mom, but right was right and wrong was wrong. My dad was the first person to fire me from a job. I was 11 or 12; I back-talked one of the supervisors and he fired me. He also made me walk about 5 miles home so I could contemplate my actions. We need more strong men at the helm of families. Ones who love their wives and children, but men who can be the disciplinarians when needed. Men who can strike fear into wayward teenage boys and girls with their presence. This is not to mean that one needs to be afraid of the father in the home, but one needs to have a healthy respect for his authority.

In the same way, we as God’s children do not need to be afraid of God. But the Bible calls us to ‘fear Him’ – to have a high regard for the name, the place, the reputation and the person of God. We see verses like the following in Proverbs 10:27:

“The fear of the LORD prolongs life, But the years of the wicked will be shortened.”

Proverbs 22:4, “The reward of humility and the fear of the LORD Are riches, honor and life.”

Proverbs 15:16, “Better is a little with the fear of the LORD than great treasure and turmoil with it.”

Proverbs 14:26-27, “In the fear of the LORD there is strong confidence, and his children will have refuge. The fear of the LORD is a fountain of life, that one may avoid the snares of death.”

I can go on and on; but the point is that when one has a healthy fear, or regard, or respect for God’s position in our lives, then we will behave differently, and it will determine how God behaves to us as well. BUT, in addition to the reverential fear that we should have for the Lord, we should also have an understanding of His power and ability to discipline as we see in Hebrews 12:6-11:

“For whom the Lord loves He chastens, and scourges every son whom He receives.’ If you endure chastening, God deals with you as with sons; for what son is there whom a father does not chasten? But if you are without chastening, of which all have become partakers, then you are illegitimate and not sons. Furthermore, we have had human fathers who corrected us, and we paid them respect. Shall we not much more readily be in subjection to the Father of spirits and live? For they indeed for a few days chastened us as seemed best to them, but He for our profit, that we may be partakers of His holiness. Now no chastening seems to be joyful for the present, but painful; nevertheless, afterward it yields the peaceable fruit of righteousness to those who have been trained by it.”

In the same way, a human father is to be feared as the one who can bring chastising on us. The word chastise means to beat with a rod, like a switch from a tree. Look at Proverbs 23:13-15:

“Withhold not correction from the child: for if thou beatest him with the rod, he shall not die. Thou shalt beat him with the rod, and shalt deliver his soul from hell. My son, if thine heart be wise, my heart shall rejoice, even mine.”

Godly men should be able to bring harsh discipline in their homes when needed. God does the same to us to benefit us and to help us and keep us FROM trouble. Now you can see the importance of having strict fathers in the home. In the last article, I said that they should act as the priests for their homes before God. But they should also be there to set the example and then to deal with disciplinary issues. There were things my mom would deal with, but then there came a point where she got dad involved; and that was a whole different level of discipline.

3. Godly men are servants

If you want to be a strong man, learn to be a servant first. One of the verses that I try to apply to my life is Philippians 2:5-7:

“Let this mind be in you, which was also in Christ Jesus: Who, being in the form of God, thought it not robbery to be equal with God: But made himself of no reputation, and took upon him the form of a servant, and was made in the likeness of men.”

Jesus took on the form of a servant. You will recall that He washed His disciple’s feet the night before He was executed. Jesus fed the poor, comforted the hurting and was of no reputation; yet, no greater nor stronger man ever walked the planet. Jesus was strong enough to be a servant. We need more servant men at the heads of our homes. Men who will love their wives and serve their kids; men who set the tone for their homes by being servants. Teaching young men that true strength is not in brawn, although that is needed at times, but in being consistently helpful, consistently there, consistently ready to do what needs to be done, consistently humbling yourself, and consistently leading them to the Lord.

Godly men can put their egos aside and humbly serve their wives, serve their kids, their churches, their communities, and on and on. If you want your wife to follow you, and your kids to honor her and you, then be the head servant in the home as Jesus came to be the head servant of the New Testament church. He is also our Heavenly Father to be feared and hallowed, but He is also the one who cleans up our lives, comforts us, feeds us, clothes us and is there for us.

We need fathers who are there, present and doing what fathers do. We need fathers who teach their kids about Jesus, teach them about forgiveness and kindness, a father who honors his wife and shows what men should be for their daughters. We need men who put Jesus first, and wives next, above all else. Strong, Godly, servant men to lead our homes, to serve in our churches and lead our nations.

May we men take heart and humble ourselves so we can be Godly men for our Lord, our families, our churches and our nations.

Missionarybaptistchurch76@yahoo.ca

 

Biblical Masculinity: Desire to be a Man in the Image of God

This is a bit of a different series for me. I know the title talks about masculinity, but many ladies will be able to benefit from this as well, I pray. There has been a decisive movement against men in the last 3-5 years. Wikipedia defines Toxic Masculinity as this:

“In psychology, toxic masculinity refers to traditional cultural masculine norms that can be harmful to men, women, and society overall; this concept of toxic masculinity is not intended to demonize men or male attributes, but rather to emphasize the harmful effects of conformity to certain traditional masculine ideal.”

They state that it is not an attack on men, but nothing could be further from the truth. From TV shows to a recent ad for razors, the attack on men has been on for years and has continued to escalate. The ultimate male that the world system hopes to confront is God himself. I have heard many say that the God of the Old Testament is not the God that they serve. He is too tough, too mean, too hard and too much. They want the Jesus of the New Testament, the one who lets the little children come to Him and seemingly does not condemn people. Many want the God who does not send people to Hell. That God does not exist in the Bible.

So, let us ask ourselves ‘what does a Biblical man look like?’ What should be the characteristics of a Biblical man? What should we be looking for? What should a woman seeking a godly husband look for in her man? What should a church look for in calling a man to lead her? What should a father, a dad, a friend who is a man look like from a Biblical perspective? I hope over the next little while to take a look at this idea of masculinity and explore it in the scriptures. We will get into a book series shortly, but this is in my mind from the Lord.

1. God does not hate Women.

God made women; He does not hate them. We are all aware of the account in Genesis 2:7, 21-25:

“And the Lord God formed man of the dust of the ground, and breathed into his nostrils the breath of life; and man became a living soul… And the Lord God caused a deep sleep to fall upon Adam, and he slept: and he took one of his ribs, and closed up the flesh instead thereof; And the rib, which the Lord God had taken from man, made he a woman, and brought her unto the man. And Adam said, this is now bone of my bones, and flesh of my flesh: she shall be called Woman, because she was taken out of Man. Therefore shall a man leave his father and his mother, and shall cleave unto his wife: and they shall be one flesh. And they were both naked, the man and his wife, and were not ashamed.”

The books of Ruth and Esther show us that God does not hate women. Even pagan women like Rahab, if they submit to the God of Israel, are honored by God. The first persons to witness the resurrection were women, not the men. This alone is a testimony that God does not hate women. In the tradition of the day, a woman’s testimony about an event was not seen as equally credible as if it was given by a man. So for God to allow the most important part of the Gospel story to be seen and witnessed by women first is a testimony of how highly He regards women, especially godly women. See Luke 24:10-12:

“It was Mary Magdalene and Joanna, and Mary the mother of James, and other women that were with them, which told these things unto the apostles. And their words seemed to them as idle tales, and they believed them not. Then arose Peter, and ran unto the sepulchre; and stooping down, he beheld the linen clothes laid by themselves, and departed, wondering in himself at that which was come to pass.”

In Luke 8:1-3, we find that it was women who provided financial help to Jesus’ earthly ministry and provided for Him and His disciples to do the work:

“After this, Jesus traveled from one city and village to another. He spread the Good News about God’s kingdom. The twelve apostles were with him. Also, some women were with him. They had been cured from evil spirits and various illnesses. These women were Mary, also called Magdalene, from whom seven demons had gone out; Joanna, whose husband Chusa was Herod’s administrator; Susanna; and many other women. They provided financial support for Jesus and his disciples.”

It is clear from the Bible that God, and Jesus for that matter, does not hate women. He loves them and made them in His image to be ‘help-meets’ for their husbands. If God hates women, then most modern churches are in trouble. Most churches have attendants that are made of over 60% women. If God hates women, our churches are in trouble. But He does not; He never has and He never will.

A godly man would never reduce or not see and understand the value of the women in his life. God sees them as fearfully made. God sees them as marvelous. God refers to Israel as His bride:

Ezekiel 16:1-8 “Again, the word of the Lord came to me, saying, ‘Son of man, cause Jerusalem to know her abominations, and say, ‘Thus says the Lord God to Jerusalem: ‘Your birth and your nativity are from the land of Canaan; your father was an Amorite and your mother a Hittite. As for your nativity, on the day you were born your navel cord was not cut, nor were you washed in water to cleanse you; you were not rubbed with salt nor wrapped in swaddling cloths. No eye pitied you, to do any of these things for you, to have compassion on you; but you were thrown out into the open field, when you yourself were loathed on the day you were born.

“And when I passed by you and saw you struggling in your own blood, I said to you in your blood, ‘Live!’ Yes, I said to you in your blood, ‘Live!’ I made you thrive like a plant in the field; and you grew, matured, and became very beautiful. Your breasts were formed, your hair grew, but you were naked and bare. When I passed by you again and looked upon you, indeed your time was the time of love; so, I spread My wing over you and covered your nakedness. Yes, I swore an oath to you and entered into a covenant with you, and you became Mine,’ says the Lord God.”

Notice that God portrays Israel as a woman, a bride. The New Testament church is called the Bride of Christ. No, God has the highest regard for women, and godly men should be the same way as well.

2. Women and Men have their place.

In God’s world, men and women are equal in value. Jesus died for both men and women, and anyone who will accept the free gift of salvation offered through Jesus will be saved. We can see this in Romans 10:13:

“For whosoever shall call upon the name of the Lord shall be saved.”

But men and women are different according to the way that the Lord created us. Men and women are equal but different in just about every way. The Bible tells us that we are fearfully and wonderfully made:

Psalm 139:14 “I will praise You, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made; marvelous are Your works, and that my soul knows very well.”

Notice that the Psalmist describes us as ‘marvelous’ in our creation. God regards women as marvelous in the way that they are made, and He regards men as marvelous in the way that they are made. But they are made differently.

I have a nurse who is a member of our church, and I am told that a coroner can tell from the bone structure if the person on the table is male or female. Even our bone structure is different. The very way that we are put together is different. We are equal but made for different things. Woman are made for child-bearing and men are not. Men are made for heavy lifting and rugged labour. For the most part, women are not. Men are mentally made for fighting in wars; most women are not. Men are good at many things, and women are good at many things. Men, for instance, have better long-distance vision and are better for night driving. Women have better peripheral vision and can see the kids in the back seat.

Men are called to be leaders in our nations, in our churches and in our homes. God has given that responsibility to the man. In Genesis 2:15-18 we see God`s first prohibitive commandment, and it was given to Adam:

“And the Lord God took the man, and put him into the garden of Eden to dress it and to keep it. And the Lord God commanded the man, saying, of every tree of the garden thou mayest freely eat: But of the tree of the knowledge of good and evil, thou shalt not eat of it: for in the day that thou eatest thereof thou shalt surely die. And the Lord God said, it is not good that the man should be alone; I will make him a help meet for him.”

Notice that God gave man the commandment; it was his job to make sure that his wife and, subsequently, his children understood the rules of God. As such, each man is a priest to his family. Look at Deuteronomy 11:19:

“Teach them to your children. Talk about them when you are at home and when you are on the road, when you are going to bed and when you are getting up.”

Also look at Deuteronomy 6:5-9: “Love the Lord your God with all your heart, with all your soul, and with all your strength. Take to heart these words that I give you today. Repeat them to your children. Talk about them when you’re at home or away, when you lie down or get up. Write them down, and tie them around your wrist, and wear them as headbands as a reminder. Write them on the doorframes of your houses and on your gates.”

In Job 1:5 we see Job acting as the priest of his family and offering sacrifices on behalf of his children and family before the Lord:

“And it was so, when the days of their feasting were gone about, that Job sent and sanctified them, and rose up early in the morning, and offered burnt offerings according to the number of them all: for Job said, It may be that my sons have sinned, and cursed God in their hearts. Thus did Job continually.”

Fathers are responsible for teaching their children about the Lord. This is not to say that women do not have a part, but the major responsibility falls on the fathers. The importance of fathers in the home is so real today, and no one wants to admit it. But I recently saw a statement where if a home is spiritually led by the kids, so that they are the ones going to church, about 9% of kids will be saved. If the home is led by the mother, about 17% will be saved. But if led by Dad, it is a whopping 83% that are saved. This is huge! God designed men to serve their families in ways that women cannot.

Women have their place as well. A read through Proverbs 31 will show us a lot about the role and place of the woman in a man’s life and in the life of the family. In Proverbs 31 beginning in verse 10, we find a woman who is industrious, who is careful to meet the needs of her family; she is a business woman and she is a great mother. We are told two amazing things about this woman. First, her value is immeasurable; her price is far above rubies. Rubies were the diamonds of Solomon’s time. They were the most precious and costly of the gemstones available to man. And, then we are told this about this woman in Proverbs 31:11:

“The heart of her husband doth safely trust in her, so that he shall have no need of spoil.”

Her husband trusts her; this was so unheard of in Biblical times. The vast majority of marriages were arranged marriages; there was little romanticizing before the couple married. You literally did not know what you were getting; and for many, the very first time they had any meaningful contact would have been the wedding night. So, the idea of a man trusting his wife was not normal. But in this case, this woman had proven herself and won the heart, the mind and the trust of her husband. He did not have to worry about the safety nor the sanctity of his household.

As you can see, men and women have different roles and responsibilities. They are not in competition; rather, they are a compliment to each other. If we recall Genesis 2:20-23, we find these words that all men should know:

“And Adam gave names to all cattle, and to the fowl of the air, and to every beast of the field; but for Adam there was not found a help meet for him. And the Lord God caused a deep sleep to fall upon Adam, and he slept: and he took one of his ribs, and closed up the flesh instead thereof; And the rib, which the Lord God had taken from man, made he a woman, and brought her unto the man. And Adam said, this is now bone of my bones, and flesh of my flesh: she shall be called Woman, because she was taken out of Man.”

Adam needed the woman to complete him. The idea of a ‘help meet’ means one fit to be a completer to him. Man was incomplete without the woman. This is essential for men to learn and to grow in their maturity. This helps to temper a man’s ego and also to focus his energies and efforts. God does not hate women, and neither should the men of God. Rather, God honors women and has high regard for them that He would fashion them to complete His creation.

Missionarybaptistchurch76@yahoo.ca