Old Dr. Carver still made house calls. One afternoon he was called to the Tuttle house. Mrs. Tuttle was in terrible pain.

The doctor came out of the bedroom a minute after he’d gone in and asked Mr. Tuttle, “Do you have a hammer?”

A puzzled Mr. Tuttle went to the garage, and returned with a hammer.

The doctor thanked him and went back into the bedroom.

A few moments later, he came out and asked, “Do you have a chisel?”

Mr. Tuttle complied with the request.

In the next ten minutes, Dr. Carver asked for and received a pair of pliers, a screwdriver, and a hacksaw.

The last request got to Mr. Tuttle. He asked, “What are you doing to my wife?”

“Not a thing,” replied old doc Carver. “I can’t get my instrument bag open.”

A woman got on a bus holding a baby. The bus driver said, “That’s the ugliest baby I’ve ever seen.”

In a huff, the woman slammed her fare into the fare box and took an aisle seat near the rear of the bus.

She fumed for a few stops & started getting really worked up.

The man seated next to her sensed that she was agitated and asked her what was wrong.

“The bus driver insulted me,” she fumed.

The man sympathized and said, “Why, he’s a public servant and shouldn’t say things to insult passengers.”

“You’re right,” she said. “I think I’ll go back up there and give him a piece of my mind.”

“That’s a good idea,” the man said. “Here, let me hold your monkey.”