As a writer, there are times when I feel strongly that the Lord wants me to open my life to my readers. Sometimes it is quite painful, but I feel that if my writing helps even one person – it is certainly well worth it.

My early life

I have said in other articles, that I can remember being melancholy at a very young age.  I remember feeling so alone. My dad was verbally abusive to me. I would laugh when he called me names, but I remember the hurt which I learned to hide well.

Beauty was everything in my family.  My mother was glamorous. My older sisters were stunningly beautiful.  Me?  I had unruly and extremely curly hair; I had buck teeth before I got my braces, and I was stick thin.  I was not a pretty or even cute little girl, and I knew it.  My dad would call me Bucky beaver and spaghetti head and other hurtful names. I wanted him to love me, so I would laugh, but I was dying inside.

My oldest sister

She was 7 years older than me, and got pregnant at 16 years old. She left our home – I was so young. I guess I never really knew her. Little did I know that the Lord would bring us together in a beautiful relationship much later in life.  I will refer to my oldest sister as (S).

My second to the oldest sister

From as far back as I can remember, this sister was cruel to me. I am not talking about normal sibling rivalry. She delighted in being cruel and torturous to me.  She was my father’s favorite child – we all knew it.  She would never talk to me, even to answer a question I asked of her. She even told me that I was adopted. She said that I could look in the mirror and see that I was not related to our family. I believed this for about 7 years until I found my Birth Certificate. I will refer to this sister as (J).

Watching friends who were “Daddy’s” girls

Nothing made me more sad than watching my friends who had dads who hugged them; who treated them like princesses.  I dreamed of this.

All I could do was dream.

My teen years

To say I rebelled would be a gross understatement.  I hung out with the wrong crowd; I self medicated with street drugs – anything to numb my brain. It’s like all of the anger and hurt that had built up inside of me, just exploded when I reached my teen years.  I became very suicidal.  I became a “cutter.”

When Mom and Dad retired to Florida

I was devastated when my parents decided to retire to Florida. It wasn’t because I was close with them. Perhaps them moving away – the finality of it – and I had not succeeded in making dad love me.

I was a believer at the time they moved. I was married with kids. I felt a burden for my dad. I felt that the Lord wanted me to write to him about Yeshua. I wanted dad to understand why I believed.  This had to be the Lord. It certainly wasn’t my own idea.  In my mind, I would have just made dad angrier at me.

But God had other ideas.

My dad wrote me back, telling me how proud he was of me. He told me that I was his strongest daughter.  He told me that I was his only child who cared about the Ten Commandments. I wondered where this was coming from. I loved it, but it seemed so strange to me.

Billy Graham Crusades

Dad began watching every televised Billy Graham crusade.  Mom was getting very frustrated with him. Watching Billy Graham was something my dad took seriously. I had to chuckle when I would hear the frustration in my mom’s voice.

A terribly botched surgery

Dad was having incapicitating  pain in his neck.  He found a surgeon in Florida who wanted to do a neck surgery on him. I called my mom and pleaded with her not to let dad go under the knife without a second opinion.  She didn’t listen and dad went ahead with the surgery.  This doctor completely botched the surgery.

The move back

Mom and dad moved back to the Washington area to seek out a neurosurgeon who might attempt another surgery to correct the first one.  When I say “botched” – when he would stand, his head would lie upon his shoulder. I felt so sorry for him.

Dad was a type 2 diabetic. When a person has diabetes, healing takes a very long time.  The second surgery, done by an excellent neurosurgeon, was not successful. The first surgery had harmed his  cervical spine beyond repair.

My mother called me every day at work, saying that my dad just wanted to see me. I went every evening to visit with him. Sister (J) who had been his favorite was livid with me.  I was told that she was angry and hurt that dad would ask to see me and not her.

I could see that dad was failing.  Eventually, he was placed in hospice care. The Lord allowed me the joyful experience of leading my father to Him in prayer. The angels rejoiced in heaven!

After dad’s death

My mom did not return to Florida after dad died.  A couple of times a month I would spend the weekend with her.  I felt so sorry for her.  One night she asked my forgiveness; she told me that both she and dad knew that my sister (J) had been so cruel to me as we were growing up, but they never tried to stop it.  I told her that it was forgiven and that I loved her.

Two years after dad died, my mom was diagnosed with an inoperable cancerous brain tumor.   She died within 6 weeks. Before she died, she asked my sisters to be kind to me when she was gone. After her funeral, my sisters told me that I should not consider myself their sister, and that I would never see them again. In 1983, after I was born again, I shared the Gospel with both sisters in a letter. I’m pretty sure that cutting me off as their sister was directly related to me being saved.

Fast forward to recent times

I saw my two sisters and their kids on Facebook. My sister (S) was FB friends with my daughter.  I wrote a note to both of them, just expressing my desire to connect with them.  Sister (S) didn’t answer. Sister (J) blocked me and had her kids do the same.  I felt like I had been punched in the gut.

One day, I asked my Christian brothers and sisters on Facebook to please pray that sister (S)  would come into my life again. She had not blocked me on FB.  God answered these prayers and she wrote to me. She said that she would talk with me on two conditions. NO talk of Jesus and NO talk of politics.  I agreed, and since then we have talked on the phone weekly, and really have a wonderful  time together.

Recently, I noticed that she sounded really sick. She would tell me that she thought that perhaps she had Rheumatoid Arthritis.  She was so congested that she could hardly talk. She said that she had stiffness in her hands and could barely use them.  I asked her if I could come up to her home and take care of her. She sounded elated that I would offer.

It’s a good thing that the Lord worked this out for me to stay with her. She was in bad shape and I drove her to her GP. She had pneumonia in her right lung. I stayed with her a little over a week.  The strong antibiotics and prednisone kicked in, and in a few days she was feeling like herself.

We talked about sis (J). She  knew that my sister was really hateful to me all of my life.  She didn’t know why.

Arriving home

After I returned home, I received a call from my sister and was quite overwhelmed when she told me some things.  She said that she called sister (J) and told her that I had come to take care of her, and how sick she had been.  She then asked a question that I’m sure shocked my sister. She asked her why she had been so cruel to me since I was a young girl.

She told sister (S)  that she saw dad being mean to me and that she began doing it too. Being dad’s favorite, I suppose that does make sense that she would emulate his actions towards me.

My husband said that this excuse was understandable when she was younger, but he couldn’t understand why she remained this way as an adult.

Forgiveness

I told sister (S)  that no matter what, I forgave my other sister. I also told her that I led dad to the Lord – that shocked her. I was able to plant many seeds during our visit. She would stop me if I began to tell her about salvation. She has a neighbor who is a Christian. She even went to church with her once. I know that the Lord has His hand on my sister.  Nothing is random.

I can’t help but wonder if I will answer the phone one day, and it will be sister (J). But if that never happens, I know that I have forgiven her. I have done what Jesus wants me to do, and that brings me peace.

I hope that the reader understands why I wrote this article. Forgiveness is not a suggestion from the Lord. He tells us that we must forgive others. I’m sure that there are brothers and sisters in Christ reading this who were even physically or sexually abused. Sin in this world has brought the most heinous things into so many of our lives.

If I had not forgiven my father, I would not have shared the Gospel with him. If I had not forgiven my sisters, my trip to sister (S) would not have happened. And who knows; maybe sister (J) will contact me.

When Jesus hung on that Cross, He forgave our wretched sins. How can we withhold forgiveness from those who have hurt us, if the Lord of Creation forgave us?

Is there someone in your life who hurt you badly, and you are still holding onto the anger and resentment?  Go to Jesus and ask Him to help you forgive this person. Pray for that person – I know it sounds impossible to do; but when you are praying for someone, it is impossible to hold onto the anger.

Shalom b’Yeshua

MARANATHA

Grandmageri422@gmail.com

Articles may be viewed at grandmageri422.me

 

The analogy between the Ark which God commanded Noah to build for him and his family; and the Savior of the world who God sent to earth to die for your sins and then to be raised on the third day is truly astounding.

Have you rejected Christ in your life?

Your opinion of Jesus and rejection of his offer of Eternal Life will seal your fate. All other so-called religions offer false hopes. Hinduism offers reincarnation as a way of “bettering” yourself in your next life.  This is a lie from Satan.

The Bible says this:

“And as it is appointed for men to die once, but after this the judgment” (Hebrews 9:27).

You have one life. You are utterly helpless apart from our Redeemer Jesus Christ. He paid the price for your sins, and made a way for you to be in heaven with the Father because of His Righteousness.

No one can work their way to heaven! How many good works are enough?  This is futile, and God wants you to know that He is waiting for you. He does the saving – not us. Do not believe the lies you have been told about God.  I am telling you the truth.

Our “works” before we are saved

Because of the Holiness of the Lord; and because He cannot abide sin in His presence – here is what He says about our so-called good works as we attempt to make it into heaven on our own:

“We are all like an unclean thing,
And all our righteousnesses are like filthy rags;
We all fade as a leaf,
And our iniquities, like the wind,
Have taken us away” (Isaiah 64:6).

Am I saying that good deeds are bad?  Not at all.  After we agree with our Lord that we are sinners and are in need of a Savior (Jesus) then our good works and deeds come out of a grateful heart towards God and toward others.

 When we are born again (saved) the Holy Spirit (the third person of the Godhead) comes to reside within us. We are no longer captives to sin. Does this mean that we will never sin?  Unfortunately, we are still in this flesh. Our flesh wars against the spirit. But the Bible says:

“If we confess our sins, He is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness” (1 John 1:9).

Even the great Apostle Paul struggled with this:

Romans 7:15-20

 “For what I am doing, I do not understand. For what I will to do, that I do not practice; but what I hate, that I do.  If, then, I do what I will not to do, I agree with the law that it is good.  But now, it is no longer I who do it, but sin that dwells in me. For I know that in me (that is, in my flesh) nothing good dwells; for to will is present with me, but how to perform what is good I do not find.  For the good that I will to do, I do not do; but the evil I will not to do, that I practice.  Now if I do what I will not to do, it is no longer I who do it, but sin that dwells in me.”

Those who belong to Christ will be Raptured and receive new bodies

When the “Rapture” happens, we who are in Christ will receive new and indestructible bodies. We will see Jesus face to face.  Those who have “died in Christ” will be raised first, and then all of us who are in Christ will be gathered up to heaven with our Lord Jesus. We will never  be separated from Him again.

Those who reject Christ, have made a decision to be in hell for Eternity

I’ve heard numerous times from unbelievers this:  “If God is good, He would not send people to hell.”  He sends no one to hell!  He did send His only begotten Son, Jesus, to earth  to die an horrific death on the Cross. He sacrificed His Son because of His love for us. He made a way for us to be reconciled to Him in heaven. If a person goes to hell, they have sent themselves there.

Many love Darkness more than Light

There are people in this world who would reject Christ right to his face – knowing full well that they are destined to be in hell for eternity.  I have often said in my articles that I don’t believe there are true “atheists” – I think that these people are God haters.  Read what the Bible says about this:

 “And even as they did not like to retain God in their knowledge, God gave them over to a debased mind, to do those things which are not fitting;  being filled with all unrighteousness, sexual immorality, wickedness, covetousness, maliciousness; full of envy, murder, strife, deceit, evil-mindedness; they are whisperers, backbiters, haters of God, violent, proud, boasters, inventors of evil things, disobedient to parents,  undiscerning, untrustworthy, unloving, unforgiving, unmerciful;  who, knowing the righteous judgment of God, that those who practice such things are deserving of death, not only do the same but also approve of those who practice them”   (Romans 1:28-32).  (emphasis added)

It is all up to you

You see all around you wars and threats of wars; natural disasters and other catastrophes.  Do you think that these are  just random events?

Read what the Bible says about the beginning of the end of days

The Signs of the Times and the End of the Age

 “Now as He sat on the Mount of Olives, the disciples came to Him privately, saying, “Tell us, when will these things be? And what will be the sign of Your coming, and of the end of the age?”

And Jesus answered and said to them: “Take heed that no one deceives you. For many will come in My name, saying, ‘I am the Christ,’ and will deceive many. And you will hear of wars and rumors of wars. See that you are not troubled; for all these things must come to pass, but the end is not yet.  For nation will rise against nation, and kingdom against kingdom. And there will be famines, pestilences, and earthquakes in various places.  All these are the beginning of sorrows”  (Matthew 24:3-8).

If you do Not receive Christ as your Savior – you will be here for the Great Tribulation

Read what the Bible says about the Great Tribulation 

“For then there will be great tribulation, such as has not been since the beginning of the world until this time, no, nor ever shall be. And unless those days were shortened, no flesh would be saved; but for the elect’s sake those days will be shortened” (Matthew 24: 21-22).

Choose Life

Forget all of the lies you have been told throughout your life. The lie of evolution is one of the most diabolical lies ever told.  You were created by God in His image. You did not evolve. You were never a monkey. God loves you.

Look around you at the beauty of this world. Just look at a perfect rose, or into the smiling eyes of a baby.  Look at the night sky twinkling with stars made by God. He has named each star – did you know that?

Hopefully, you are wondering what you should do to be saved.  Click this link and read the way to be born again from above. Make sure that you are sincere in this decision – God cannot be mocked.  He knows whether your intentions are genuine or not.

I pray that you are ready to relinquish your life to Jesus Christ. This is the most important decision you will ever make:

How Can I Be Saved?

Come Lord Jesus – Come Quickly!

grandmageri422@gmail.com